Normal Reactions of Children during their Parents Divorce
Family Court Judges are receiving judicial education on child development, how to deal with persons in emotional crisis, and normal reactions of children during their parents dissolution. Children thrive with a plan, now mandated by Florida law that maintains or addresses their psychological and developmental needs, such as age, temperament, attachments, physical and developmental needs, such as age, temperament, attachments, physical maturity, cognitive abilities, social relationships, and emotional development. family attorney must have this knowledge if providing representation regarding parental responsibility and child issues.
The parent may reflect concerns about the children during the process of the dissolution of marriage. The client may project problems the children are having as being caused by the spouse. Reviewing a chart of the normal reactions of children during the parents dissolution of marriage and discussing and evaluating what is happening compared to the chart reactions may assist in reality training of the client, as well as providing for the best interest of the children, and lessen hostilities and conflict.
For example, the client may reflect the 3-year old should not have overnights with the spouse as the child started bed wetting since sleeping at the spouse?s home. The client may want the lawyer to seek to limit contact with the spouse. A review of the chart and literature in this area will inform the client that regressive behaviors are normal reactions of a child of that age during the parent?s dissolution of marriage. Not only may the client?s plan of proceeding in court fail, but it may backfire. The child may be actually harmed by this course of action that the more appropriate courses of actions for this problem. The family court judge may be concern about the client?s intent and motivation to project the child?s problems in the spouse, rather than to obtain the information necessary to provide for the children’s best interest.
The family lawyer, as a counselor, needs to obtain the information to assist the client in the alternatives in this regard. With the client and the family lawyer working together to determine a plan, they are participating in the process of therapeutic justice, a process that attempts to address the family?s interrelated legal and non-legal problems to produce a result that improves the family?s functioning after the dissolution of marriage. There is no pushing the spouse into a difficult stage and into litigation mode. Everyone wins, no one loses. There are creative solutions to dealing with the impact of the emotional process on the legal process; if the family lawyer and client feel uncomfortable with the exercise without expertise of a psychological professional, the lawyer can incorporate a joint session with a psychologist into the representation of the client.
